Dr. Jillo's Scientific Research on MUDs

Last three years I spent all of my time to developing a mathematical formula expressing the relation between several MUD-parameters and the satisfaction delivered by this MUD. Although it is too soon to jump to any conclusion I would like to submit my first results on this -ambitious- project.

I used several parameters which, as in every sound scientific report, are being defined now:

  S       Satisfaction
  w       amount of whining
  bs      amount of bs post in RN E{bs}
  abs     amount of bs post in RN E{-bs}
  e       effort made by wizzes to improve this MUD
  ncs     new cool stuff coded by wizzes for MUD player population A
  f       amount of flame done about <ncs> by MUD player population -A
  fun     amount of fun experienced by total MUD population
  afun    amount of nonfun experienced by total MUD population
          Side Note 1: both parameter <fun> and <afun> are highly
          subjective; therefore i minimized their weightfactor.
          Side Note 2: i conducted a full scale MUD wise investigation
          to figure out <fun> and <afun> as objective as possible.
          HOWEVER some values of investigated <afun> were so
          extremely high that i had to discard them for mainly two
          reasons;
          1) I discussed these extreme values with the scientific
          community and they are thought to be unlikely in a place
          which objective is to maximize <fun> and minimize <afun>.
          2) A few <afun> values approached infinity and threathened
          to screw up my formula ;)
  r       request done by single player
  #r      total amount of requesting r by same single player
  rr      level or rejection of request done by same single player
  as      total number of posts requesting autoloading sabers done
  by      total MUD player population
  #s      total amount of the word sux/suck/sucks in total RN database
          in amount of intending done by Shoomeone;)

Well after using several fit-data-to-formulas algorithms I found the following formula (It linewraps but should be read as all on one line):

S:= SQRT(in) -#s^PI -r^(#r*rr) -EXP(as*(f-fun)) +LOG(abs-bs) -LOG(e^ncs) -cot(f+afun) 
    +O(ncs^5) -w

As everyone with some basic math knowledge can see, there's a shocking trend. It seems that the most significant factor decreasing S it NOT, I must stress is NOT, the amount of whining/flaming/ranting done by the total MUD player combination. My formula proves that the most significant factor reducing S is <ncs> and <e>. In other words, the MUD wizz population is guilty of decreasing our total S. This might seem to be a paradox, but as we think about it for a second, there's a scientific sound arguement defending my results; although the <e> and <ncs> parameters' direct effect on S is a positive one, it is insignificant to their indirect effect (<e> en <ncs> increase <f> exponentionally). Therefore I recommend we decrease <e> and <ncs> as much as possible in order to boost S.

Summarizing, my scientific results show that the wizzes should stop putting effort in improving this MUD and decrease the amount of cool stuff. It's not too late, if you act now!

In the light of the scientific thruth I must admit, rumors exist that the relation between S and <e> and <ncs> on other MUDs seem to be positively correlated though. But that's just rumors and not scientific research.

Dr. Jillo

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